Doing ok

And back to the real world….URGH! I feel stressed again tonight but I suppose that is partly to do with my counselling session I had but not in a bad way, it’s just that is stirs stuff up and it takes time to process.

After waking up at 7 am and having breakfast I went back to bed until 10 am lol, I just needed that extra lil snooze before facing the rest of the day.

I did intend to clean the flat this morning because it’s a fucking state! But fuck it it can wait. So I’ll be doing that tomorrow.

Did my usual morning stuff getting myself and the animals sorted. Took the pups out for their morning run and sat with the sun shining on my face and legs while I watched the pups play 🙂 it was so nice just to be in that moment with them.

I had my 1:1 gender identity counselling this afternoon 1-2. It was good again we talked about so much. My life feels like one big knot that needs unpicking, sometimes it feels and impossible task but I’m up for the fight..I think.

Met L and the boys after at a place called Sprinkles, I’ve never been before, its an ice cream parlour. It was really nice but I had sensory overload with noise, sight and smell.

Spent some time in town, I had my haircut and now I am a fly boy! 🙂

As soon as I got home I said a quick hello to my babies and I jumped in the shower, I HATE being hairy but love having my haircut.

Had some dinner and finished off my picture in my Animorphia colouring book 🙂 So pleased with it.

Just been chilling this evening. Feeling hungry again…hmm CAKE! lol no need to rush to bed tonight because I’m not tired yet and I have nothing to get up for tomorrow. Might just chill for a bit longer before the sleep thing

Overall feeling ok today, I suppose..

 My finished picture

 🙂

Peace out

Batman

4 Comments on “Doing ok

  1. I wanted to say something earlier, but I first wanted to go back and read your previous blogs I have missed.

    It seems as though in the last six weeks or so, you have had more “down” kind of days. You have mentioned many times needing Dyllan time. You mentioned after your 1:1 appointment filling as though your in knots that need to be unpicked.

    You wrote “sometimes I feel like I’m up against an impossible task” and then you added “I think.” Are you trying to convince yourself, all of us, or are you having second thoughts? Any one of those possible answers are fine, I am just worried about you. I have seen a definite switch with your emotional side for a little while. ❤

  2. Hey I appreciate your comments but I’m not having second thoughts at all. I know for sure what I want and who I am and that will never change. Transition is a very long hard process which brings a LOT of stuff up and so does the counselling it makes you question everything.

    I’m fine, I deal with so much stuff each day and sometimes just having a shower it overwhelming. I love me time, I love being on my own because being with other people all the time is too hard, my brain can’t take it. Because it’s just hard work, being chronically ill, trying to keep my moods on an even keel, dealing with gender dysphoria, as well as doing day to day stuff, going to my groups, doing my volunteer work, seeing friends and doing fun stuff. It’s hard work to get balance and I struggle with it because I am doing all of it by myself. So yeah it has an effect of my mood.

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